|The "It was going to happen sooner or later" Graduation Entry
||[May. 13th, 2006|09:08 pm]
|||||The stillness of trees||]|
Ok, so, it's that time of the year, time to reflect, you all know the time I'm talking about- the time when this crazy four year experiment we call college will finally be coming to an end. And while I don't think it will hit me until I don't go back to Fordham for Orientation at summer's end, I think it is time to do this required entry right here, right now (while in Connecticut, the sleepiest place on earth).
Last week brought my last classes as an undergrad (yes, I plan on going to grad school in a year). This means it brought the best 3 papers I have written in my career:
15 pages on White Trash in Film, using 8 Mile and American History X
15 pages on the History of Bacardi in Cuba (yes, I managed to write a seminar paper on liquor)
33 pages, my sexy-ass thesis, on the portrayal of Judas Iscariot in Film (yes, I managed to write my thesis
using a movie musical
Writing my thesis somehow seemed like a nice finish of college. This is because the whole time I've been lamenting that I haven't really learned much in college- I've forgotten a whole lot of facts that I learned in High School (a.k.a. everything Donald Titus ever tought me). However, it was during my marathon 8 hour writing process that I realized something- Fordham may not have taught me the year of the Iran-Contra Scandal, but it taught me something more important. Whether it was its intention or not, I realized that Fordham taught me how to teach myself, which is a lesson that I am grateful for. And that is one that applies far beyond the classroom.
My roommates have taught me something, my friends have taught me something, even though I believed taht I was a totally grown person by the time I finished high school. I now know that I knew myself fully, but did not really know how to deal with others. Plus I had a Pakistani roommate who I basically want to adopt (LOVE her). Now, could I have said that before senior year? No!
Junior and Senior year I also found that community that has somewhat alluded me- having friends is different than having a community. OSA, while there is PLENTY of bullshit, felt like a family. There was the retarded brother that everyone's a little ashamed of, the horrifyingly enept sister who deep inside is a whole lot of insecure, the domineering patriarch with a big heart, the caring momma always around to lend an ear and a hug, and scores of friends, neighbors, and other relatives. It was a constant, one that I'm not sure I'm ready to give up just yet.
So, what does this all mean? WHya re we here on this planet? I don't know, but I am finally happy to exist in a small community in the biggest, best city in the world.
I am also grateful to haev it as good as I do right now. I have a job I love (most of the time), friends I love, and an apartment that I will love once we make it a home.
Through all the bullshit that was Fordham, I know that I have been shaped by it. By the school, its dogma, but mostly, by the people who decided to make it their college decision 4 years ago, just as I did, or more recently.
So, that was the irresistable College Is Over entry. I hope you all enjoyed it. Think of it when our Saludictorian is god-awful (even though I don't who that is going to be).
And I'll see you on May 20. You'll be in the Bronx, and you'll be wet, whether from the sweat dripping down your body or the rain falling on your face. Good times.